While I was pregnant with my second son Jet, I wrote down some thoughts I had:
My body is inevitably changing, but why do some people find it their duty to make judgemental comments?
'Your belly is so big' ,'You're too tiny, you need to eat' ,'How much weight have you gained?'.
As I stepped onto the bathroom scale the most prominent echo I hear is one of a doctor I heard years ago just before I had my first son Kyler saying:
'You know, a pregnant woman really only needs to gain about 12 or 13 lbs throughout their whole pregnancy'.
While countless other doctors and charts say it is normal and healthy for a woman my size to gain 30 or more lbs throughout the pregnancy, this one nonchalant thoughtless comment still lingers.
I'm not posting this for people to tell me nice things. I'm posting this to tell people that words matter. Bodies are beautiful. All shapes, all sizes, whole or not, all colors, all modifications. It is where we live and we are all blessed to have whatever body we are given. No matter how muscular, how petite, how short or how tall we are, if we are missing something or have a little something extra, we won't be comfortable in our own skin with people and the media constantly forcing the idea of a 'perfect body'.
This is an issue that has haunted me since adolescence. I never want my children to judge their bodies and feel shame. The other day Kyler, who is only 4 years old, repeated word for word something I did not think he had heard. It broke my heart to hear him utter the words 'Ugh I feel so fat'.
Something needs to change. I need to change. My husband and I have been working on how we talk about ourselves - especially in front of the kids.
It seems that I read that Kate Winslet purposely says positive things about her body in front of her daughter. and I think the world needs more of that. I'm going to start this even though I have boys, and encourage other parents to do the same.
